“On the Other Side of Grief”

Spring has almost sprung and its time to look forward to living. Yet, you feel like you are stuck. You lost a loved one recently, you lost your job, or you have experienced some other setback and it has taken the wind out of your sails. Your zest for living is gone. You remember how it used to be and the pain is not subsiding. Smack in the middle of grief, you wish there was a lifeline to pull you through. Well, last Thursday Health Watch threw out the lifeline by focusing our attention on grief. It was a Health Watch you would not have wanted to miss!

John Baker and Nicole Hilliard, grief counselors with Alive Hospice came to talk to Health Watch about grief. When it comes to grief there is more than meets the eye. Grief is as unique as the person experiencing it. How a person responds to grief reflects one’s background, how they learned to cope, as well as what kind of experience is causing the grief. Grief over the loss of a parent by an adult child will not be the same as the grief experienced by parents who lost a young child. Because what causes grief is not the same, dealing with our grief requires understanding it in context.

John and Nicole further shared why grieving is especially hard for some people. Death often triggers unresolved issues for those left to grieve. Whether it is anger, guilt, resentment, or abandonment, dealing with these feelings in an environment where you can express them honestly and without being judged are key to moving through the grieving process.

Grief is a process. It is not something that goes away automatically or quickly. Grieving takes time. Those were important take-aways from Thursday’s Health Watch. Grief comes with peaks and valleys, times when you will feel fairly normal and those when you might not. Grief can also manifest itself in many ways. For some concentration is thrown off, sleeping becomes difficult, or they cope by staying busy. For children grief is often reflected in play, especially acting out how they or others are feeling. Paying attention to one’s feelings is an important part of the process.

Grieving is not a process that has to be endured alone. When a person dies things are not the same. A new sense of normalcy has to be created. Nicole likened this to having a beautiful vase shatter. All that is left are broken pieces. Yet, from those broken pieces a stained glass window can be made. That is what life on the other side of grief looks like. Hope resides in picking up the pieces. This is also the point where individual and group grief recovery can become vitally important. Support can help those grieving pick up the pieces and put them back together.

If you are looking for support to help you or others grieve, then a resource like Alive Hospice may have the answers you need. The link below can connect you to what they offer: http://www.alivehospice.org/

Grieving is an experience best shared. Health Watch is a shoulder you can lean on for information and support. When you need us, we are here. So until next time, remember, “When we know better, we should do better. So pass it on!”

“Lean on Me”

Perhaps above all else, most of us value our independence. We like to come and go as we please, being as active as we can for as long as possible. However, life makes us have to depend on others. No person is an island unto themselves. Whether it is because of a severe accident, debilitating illness or other medical condition, being totally independent is not always possible.

When illness or severe accidents happen, whether for our selves or our loved ones, at some point the conversation turns to “long-term care.” When most people hear those words they think about nursing homes, seemingly dull, sad and depressing places where old people are warehoused until they die. These kinds of images make us shudder. They also make the prospect of growing older or needing care frightening. Yet, long-term care – what it means and the many options available – includes much more than nursing homes. It includes a variety of services that can make living independently possible once again and life enjoyable no matter what your age or physical condition. That’s why last Thursday’s Health Watch wanted to find out more about long-term care.

Joining us to talk to us about the “ends and outs” of long-term care and the variety of options available was Ms. Beverly Bass, a staff member with Bordeaux Long-Term Care. Ms. Bass shared with us that when it comes to long-term care, it truly is a whole new world. Driven in part by consumer demand (particularly aging Baby Boomers who are better educated and savvy consumers), people are demanding more options and better quality long-term care. Long-term care providers have heard these demands and are responding accordingly.

Did you know that it is possible to remain in your home and receive long-term care assistance? Personal care assistants are providers who come to your home and help with basic activities of daily living (i.e., assistance with bathing, getting dressed, and light housekeeping). These providers can also do assessments of your home and point out areas where minor improvements can make getting around your home more pleasant and safe. Along we these care providers, there are others who offer assistance going to the grocery store and running other errands. Medicaid, Medicare and other insurance providers cover many of these services. Most do not require a person to sell their assets (namely your home) in order to receive care. (That’s a relief!)

Ms. Bass also told us that for those needing more assistance many facilities, like Bordeaux Long-Term Care Facility, offers adult daycare, assisted living and residential care. These types of care often incorporate patient-centered philosophies, like the Eden Alternative, which focus on providing residents with community-like atmospheres. They also include amenities, such as: pets, plants, laughter, and fun activities. Instead of being places where residents look forward to dying, current options in long-term care focus on living to the fullest, no matter a person’s age, physical condition or care needs.

These care services not only help those needing care, they can also be a tremendous benefit to loved ones too by reducing the stress and burden that goes along with providing long-term care. If you missed Thursday’s Health Watch then you missed something important!

If you are considering long-term care, either for yourself or someone you love, then the links below might be just what you need to get you started.

http://www.medicare.gov/longTermCare/static/home.asp (Official Medicare site for long-term care concerns)

http://www.bordeauxltc.org/ (Bordeaux Long Term Care Facility. The facility also has counselors available to answer your questions.)

http://www.edenalt.org/about-the-eden-alternative (The Eden Alternative concept)

Long-term care is not something to be afraid of. Likewise, long-term care is not a one-size fits all approach to getting the care you need. The options available are as diverse as the people and families who receive long-term care. Most are only a phone call away.

Growing older or needing care is not something to dread. It might in fact be the start of truly living better. Therefore, Health Watch will continue to bring you the information you need to live life, no matter what your age or condition, to the fullest. Until next time remember, “When we know better, we should do better. So pass it on!”

“Putting Your Best Foot Forward”

You have heard the expression, “Put your best foot forward.” For most of us that is an idiom; not something we take literally. But maybe we should. Feet are an important part of our bodies, ones that we often overlook and neglect. Despite not paying as much attention to them as we should, our feet keep us firmly planted on the ground and take us from place. Feet are an amazing tool. So amazing in fact, that yesterday Health Watch dedicated an entire hour to talking about feet with Dr. Mark Hinkes, DPM founder of Amputation Prevention Partners, LLC in Nashville.

Dr. Hinkes not only talked about the most common kinds of foot conditions (Dr. Hinkes has treated thousands of patients in his 30+ year career) he also gave our listeners simple things to do to prevent and relieve these conditions. Take for instance dry skin on heels and foot pads. Dr. Hinkes told us that products containing urea penetrate deep into the skin providing moisture that can make cracked heels a thing of the past.

When it comes to corns and calluses, Dr. Hinkes admonished us not to take matters into our own hands literally. He talked to us about the dangers of removing corns with razor blades and other sharp objects (namely because of poor lighting, unsteady hands, not knowing when enough cutting is too much), advising us instead to seek help from a local podiatrist instead. Dr. Hinkes also talked to us about nail fungus, thick, discolored and brittle nails. Instead of rushing to the drug store for the latest over-the-counter treatment (many of which contain salicylic acid), Dr. Hinkes told us about prescription medications we can take short term (up to 3 months) as well as new laser treatments that can rid our toenails of these troubles for good. If you missed last night’s Health Watch then you missed stepping off on the right foot in 2010.

Dr. Hinkes also talked about his real passion, preventing amputations. With simple strategies for foot care, developed working with veterans and others diabetics, Dr. Hinkes has helped people with diabetes keep their feet and toes. So committed to this work, Dr. Hinkes has written a book entitled, Keep the Legs You Stand On. Some of our Health Watch callers received copies last night as giveaways.

From the number of questions generated from last night’s discussion, putting our best foot forward is an issue many Health Watch listeners are concerned about. That’s why we will be bringing Dr. Hinkes back on Health Watch just as soon as we can arrange it. So stay tuned to Health Watch to get the answers you need for your foot concerns.

If you missed the program or want to find out more about Dr. Hinkes and his work, then check out his website at this link: www.amputationprevention.com

Until next time, keep putting your best foot forward and remember, “When we know better, we do better. So pass it on!”

“Love the One You're With”

Most people dream one day they will find that special someone, fall in love and live happily ever after. For those fortunate to find true love, being part of a pair is a blessing. But, that dream does not work out for everyone. Whether because of divorce, death, or not being able to find that certain someone, many people end up living alone for some period of their adult lives. There are those who relish singleness and make the most of living solo. Others seem to dread being alone, falling deeper and deeper into despair.

What separates those who are single and satisfied from those who are alone and lonely? That is what Health Watch wanted to find out as we explored “Being Single and Mastering the Art of Aloneness.” Helping us to think about these issues was Lauren Mackler, a professional life coach and author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life. On the heels of a lonely Valentine’s Day for some, Lauren’s advice was just what many of our Health Watch listeners needed to hear.

Lauren shared that mastering the art of aloneness is not about advocating for being solo. Instead mastering the art of aloneness is about understanding and loving yourself first so no matter whether you are paired or not, you can get the best out of life. Since you live with yourself 24/7/365, then it makes sense you should like and love yourself best. For Lauren, appreciating aloneness starts with understanding critical things about our selves. Take for instance your family of origin. The family you were raised in has a significant impact on how you think about yourself and deal with being alone. Were you the “hero” in your family or “the rebel”? Were you the oldest child or the middle one? These dynamics influence how you see yourself and interact with others.

Laruen also shared ways to overcome the fears that keep us from living to our fullest and how to quiet the chatter in our heads that makes us feel unworthy of love. Lauren’s candor and kindness had our Health Watch listeners glued to their seats. Health Watch listeners were even calling in days after the show to find out how they could get a copy of Lauren’s book for their own process of self-discovery. It was a Health Watch show worth hearing!

If you were not able to tune in or want to find out more about Lauren and her book, then check out this link: http://www.laurenmackler.com/

Loving yourself is the greatest love of all. Health Watch is convinced of this and we hope our listeners are as well. Until next time remember, “When we know better, we do better. So pass it on!”

“The Past is Prologue to the Future”

In 1926, the eminent historian Carter G. Woodson established “Negro History Week.” Designated as the second week in February, the annual event coincided with the birthdays of two figures significant in the history of African Americans – Abraham Lincoln, credited with signing the Emancipation Proclamation and Fredrick Douglass, the ardent abolitionist who once had been enslaved. Woodson intended the commemoration as an opportunity to celebrate the contributions of people of African descent all over the world. From that humble beginning, “Negro History Week” became Black History Month.

Although some question the relevance of Black History Month, it is hard to imagine what the world would look like without the accomplishments of people of African descent. Whether as inventors, educators, politicians, or entrepreneurs, African Americans have contributed significantly to the history of this country and the world. The same holds true for health.

Sheroes and heroes made tremendous strides in the past and contemporary trendsetters continue to revolutionize the science, practice, administration and art of health and healthcare. In honor of Black History Month, Health Watch wanted to consider some of these history makers and their contributions. Joining us to talk about African American health history makers was Dr. Cecil Cone, a pathologist and medical history buff from Meharry Medical College.

Dr. Cone shared with our listeners how the history of medicine in the United States owes a tremendous debt to the contributions of African Americans and people of African descent. Whether it is Dr. Daniel Hale Williams who performed the first successful open heart surgery in 1893 (and who still at Howard University is honored with an intercom page for “Dr. Dan” whenever a patient is in cardiac distress) to Dr Charles Drew who made critical strides in blood plasma and even established the nation’s first blood bank (yet when he was injured, was not able to access the same life-giving treatments he designed because of segregationist medical policies). Even the founding of medicine itself is a testament to Imhotep, an Egyptian astronomer, philosopher and healer as much as it is to Hippocrates. That legacy of African American history makers in health and science continues today.

Dr. Cone schooled us about current historical leaders in health. He reminded us that there have been three African American U.S. Surgeon Generals (including the current one, Dr. Regina Benjamin), along with several Tennessee Department of Health and Mental Health Commissioners, Dr. Kenneth Robinson, Mr. Eric Taylor, and Mr. Evelyn Robertson and local Public Health Department directors, namely Ms. Yvonne Madlock (Memphis) and Dr. Stephanie Bailey (formerly with the Nashville Health Department). It was clear from our conversation that the legacy African American leadership in health continues.

So in honor of past, present and future health makers, Health Watch salutes you. Just like these leaders Health Watch will continue to do its part to “make health happen.” We hope you will do the same. Until next time remember, “When we know better, we do better. So pass it on!”

“A Circle of Promise”

When you are blessed, bless someone else. Sharing a blessing is how all great movements get started. One person shares what they have and others do the same. The idea of sharing blessings is behind Health Watch’s tagline, “When we know better, we do better. So pass it on!” We are blessed to be a blessing.

In the spirit of blessing, we invited Crystal King of Susan G. Komen for the Cure to be a guest on Health Watch a few weeks ago. Phoning in from Dallas, Texas, Crystal talked to Health Watch about a Komen for the Cure effort, Circle of Promise.

Circle of Promise is a movement to provide African Americans with tools to improve their health and empower communities with information about breast cancer. Circle of Promise members serve as ambassadors in their local communities. They advocate for greater access to breast cancer screening, mobilize friends and family to reclaim health, and separate facts from myths about breast cancer. They also inspire others to spread these messages of hope to those they know and love. Since starting, thousands have become Circle of Promise ambassadors. Susan G. Komen for the Cure is looking to recruit even more.

Supporting Circle of Promise are national ambassadors, including: singers Pattie LaBelle and Lalah Hathaway; Tom Joyner Morning Show co-host, Sybil Wilkes; artist Synthia SAINT JAMES, and many, many more. Crystal, herself a breast cancer survivor, has been featured as a Circle of Promise ambassador on corporate partner products. Circle of Promise includes people from all walks of life. Both the international celebrity and the faithful community member have a sphere of influence. That sphere can be a circle of promise to end breast cancer.

If you have been blessed and want to bless others, then Circle of Promise might be your opportunity. For more information about Circle of Promise and Susan G. Komen for the Cure, check out this website: http://www.circleofpromise.org/default.aspx

Health Watch has joined the Circle of Promise. Hope you will, too. Until next time, remember “When we know better, we do better. So pass it on!”

“Feel Good About Being You”

Confidence -some people seem to have an over abundance of it, while others do not have enough. Being confident is something it seems like either you are either born with or struggle to develop. Unfortunately, too many find themselves in the latter category. Self-doubt can cause us to be anxious, stressed out and fearful. Yet, having the right amount of confidence can make the world seem like a place full of opportunities and possibilities, all with our names written on them. Confidence – how to achieve and maintain it – was the focus of last evening’s Health Watch.

Health Watch talked to two licensed psychologists, Dr. Leslie Sokol and Dr. Marci Fox, who work with clients in Philadelphia and Florida to boost their self-esteem and confidence. They had a lot to tell us about confidence and why too many of us are plagued by self-doubt. It was a Health Watch episode worth hearing.

For starters, they shared that there is a difference between self-doubt and realistic concern. Realistic concern is anxiety which manifests when you know you do not have the skills, training or experience to accomplish a particular goal. Realistic concern is reasonable because it alerts you to a need that you can work to address. However, self-doubt is different. Self-doubt says you cannot accomplish or achieve when all of your training, skills and experience say differently. Self-doubt is being concerned when there is really no need to be alarmed. Drs. Fox and Sokol shared a lot more about how doubt can wreak havoc on our confidence.

Doubts, whether they stem from our need to feel competent or to be accepted, can affect the way we see the world. When put in situations that cause us stress, one of those needs – either to be viewed as competent or be accepted – will fire up our doubts. As a result, we will “see” or “read into” situations things that are probably not true at all. Doubt can sabotage us before we even get started. Yet, thankfully Drs. Sokol and Fox shared there is a way to overcome doubt and regain the confidence that is rightfully ours. It begins first with acknowledgement.

Drs. Sokol and Fox advocate that we acknowledge each of us is a complete package and not a single item. What that means is that any one failure or set-back is not the sum total of who we are. Instead, it is one event. It does not define all of who we are. Therefore, we should not give it power over us. We define who we are, not a single event!

Another strategy they suggest is going on a fact finding mission to discover our assets- the unique and wonderful things that make us who we are. If we are not sure what those assets are, then ask people you know and trust to help identify them. Writing these assets down can help us see facts that support believing in and feeling good about ourselves. There were many more bits of wisdom our Health Watch guests had to share.

If you are in need of a confidence boost, then Drs. Sokol and Fox may have exactly the resource you are looking for. They have outlined their approach to confidence building in a book aptly titled, Think Confident, Be Confident: A Four-Step Program to Eliminate Doubt and Achieve Lifelong Self-Esteem. It is easy to read and provides quizzes and worksheets to help you with identifying your doubts and building your confidence.

To find out more about Drs. Sokol and Fox as well as the book, be sure to check out this link: http://www.thinkconfidentbeconfident.com/

We each have a right to feel good about who we are and our accomplishments. Both can be the fuel to propel us to higher and higher heights. As we grow in confidence, we can help others to do the same. Health Watch will keep doing its part to lead us on a path to confidence and health. Until next time remember, “When we know better, we should do better. Then pass it on!”